Today isthe day right before the speech contest final. However, people still wanted me to do extra work, like Cool English, material order, and some others. I am stressed out because I heard that the final was until 11 pm precious 2 years. As a host department, I have to stay for 3 nights in total and I hope I can skip the activity on May 6th.

Now I am subbing TOEFL class and students are asked to do Barron’s reading. Therefore, I have some free time here to type what I am thinking. I really don’t have a full clear picture of what I nned to do as a host section for the speech contest final, but I’ve tried my best.

I feel so weak and tried recently… but I decide to renew the contract with the school. I feel like I need to talk to people, but it is just my desire. I clearly knw that it will not help at all. After all, everyone has his/her live and every individual has dissferent thoughts. I just have to be my own and that’s it!

Since I don’t want to bother people, I decided to type my reflection here. After consideration and struggling, I decided to renew my contract with my current school. However, I am not sure if it is a wise decision or not. I miss everyone who has been helping me throughout this process of becoming a teacher.

Sally and Nina, thank you for your suggestions and patience for listening to me.

Craig, I am grateful and feel so touched that your support and our friendship across the distance.

Hsuan Hsuan, thank you for your support all along the way…

Grace, I miss you. After the battle of the speech contest, I will need to talk to you. Your voice and words make me feel stable.

Ming De, thank you for coming and asking me out for dinner. It’s been a while I dare not to do so.

Grandma, thank you for reminding me that I am a FULL-TIME LICENCED TEACHER.

I hope all of you are doing well and me, too.

As I am in charge of ESL academic section, I am the host of the speech contest. During this week, we finally finished the semifinal. I have to say that sometimes honesty and being brave to SAY NO are critical. I am exhausted. I had to sub, cover the people who are complaining and “too busy”, and serve coffee to colleges… I hosted the speech contest from period 4 to period 9 and had my class for period 10. This means, I literally worked from period 4 to period 10. It was 8 periods in total. (He promised me the same situation would NOT happen again, but…see?)

I was willing to renew my contract with the school with only one request that I would like to purely teach but not work as an admin teacher. However, the CEO strongly disagreed with my thoughts and I felt disrespected. No one talked to me privately, but she just publically mentioned it to me and refused my request in front of other people. Also, all my ex-bosses expressed concern and talked with me when a similar situation happened. He, or They, did NOTHING at all. Now, although I barely can’t find any teaching jobs around here, I still choose NOT to renew the contract. Honestly, I don’t know where to go, but I am sure if I renew the contract, I can’t fulfill it for a year, so I will be fined or sued.

Touture:

• People always find excuses and those who did so can skip their jobs all the time. (濫好人，慣壞懶人們）
• Always being the backup （備胎）
• Does Admin overweigh teaching （我懷疑，我是老師嗎？還是跟以前一樣是職員，矮老師一截？為什麼我要拜託她們？雜事一堆）
• Exhaust and emotional damage （操到爆，身心俱疲，沒體力正常生活）
• Not being treated as a teacher but as an assistant （我是助理還是老師？）
• cannot find the balance between work and life （工作生活不平衡）
• I am always the busiest person in the office. Others can sleep, read leaisure books, chat, message, and punch out at 5:03 pm. （勞逸不均，我操到累死，有人閒到睡覺）

The school is in the process of renewing the teachers’ contracts. However, since I often cannot afford the energy to function in my normal life, balancing work and life, I am hesitating.

Recently, we are hosting the speech contest semi-final and teachers in this school have lots of opinions and refuse to help due to different reasons. I feel so annoyed and frustrated. If this is because I am new, then 7 years ago, things in I-Shou should have been MUCH more difficult… Therefore, I think some teachers are so dared, mean, and not supportive. Also, the boss was part of the problem, too.

Well, recently, I accidentally found out a Jazz radio station, FM 97. A 24-7 Canada’s only jazz radio broadcaster and supported organization. Nice!

I am still busy but luckily, not as busy as 2 weeks ago. I got to learn the way to survive here. I tried to keep myself busy like everyone. (By the way, I think that most teachers sit in the front roles and back roles in the office are not as busy as us….) I always woder why and I think it is unfair. I also wanna a bit relaxed and not so busy. However, Since I keep myself busy, I got some ” flexible” time which I can write my blog. (The teachers sit in the front always read the leisure books or chatted in a more casual way.) I feel like we are NOT living in the same world. I was a bit jealous because as teachers, besides teaching, they don’t have to do anything else and no one really care or ask them to sub classes or do extra work. However, I am such a busy person in this school as a new teacher and a special assistent. Latter, I am going to have my 3A class, I hope this will be fine. I am actually looking forward to the tomb sweeping long weekend already.